hallo. mijn naam is johannes gerardus klabbers. until the age of 22 i was hans. it never occurred to me that my name was annoying until i came to live in an english speaking country where it sounded like a serious breach of the rules in a game of soccer.

i was born above the big rivers on my mother’s 23rd birthday in the long shadow of the nazi occupation and the famine in the honger winter of 1944-5.

at the ages of 5, 10, 14, and 20 there were Events that would take the rest of my life to come to terms with.

and at age 60 there was a catastrophe.

i live in the kingdom of the sick and i used to live under a rock, afraid of things that might befall me — but i didn’t know it.

my life has been lived under the sign of things-that-almost-happened.

this is my advanced care directive.